Monday, December 8, 2008

Shadchan Resume: A Slap in The Face

There is an op-ed in today's Jpost (why this is an op-ed is beyond me), which just shocks me in the cynical nature that the author takes. Many 'shadchanim' ( matchmakers) try and set up men and women out of pure kindness. They make no money for the service. The author seems to take the track that unless you have successfully set up hundreds of couples, you need not try.

His cynical use of a checklist with questions the like of: " What percentage of the time that you set singles up do they actually get married?
a) Less than 1 percent
b) More than 1 percent
c) A monkey could do just as well

This is just a slap in the face to those who try. So what if your success rate isn't so hot? How high is the author's success rate with women that he just asks out. The answer: zero, he is still single.

I assume that the author is still single. Why the hatred towards those who want to help men and women find each other and get married?

"Since shadchanim [matchmakers] and shidduch [matchmaking] groups as a whole have been doing such a remarkably efficient and successful job, our community and its leaders continue to tout more of each as the primary solution to the "shidduch crisis."

Does the author really believe that there is no 'Shidduch crisis?' How does he explain the thousands and thousands of unmarried men and women. Have we ever had so many older singles in our history?

As an amateur matchmaker I am offended by this article. It's like he is spitting in the face of those just trying to do a kind act. I am just trying to help. If the author doesn't want my help, or that of other matchmakers who volunteer their precious time, then I wish him all the luck.

1 comment:

abekatsman said...

i think you're missing his point. look up his organization--endthemadness.com--i think you'll agree with most of what he says. you and your fellow band of syas shadchanim are not the target of his snarky op-ed. (although, it would apply to a lot of syas shadchanom, as well.)